Abraham and Isaac Genesis 22- Submission

Submission  and obedience. Ah those often most difficult of subjects for us ( well women...ok ME) . I have read and re read the story of Abraham and Isaac in Genesis 22  (http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=genesis%2022&version=NKJV).  Reading it recently  I thought about the act of giving up a child. Could I do that? I struggle with even giving up a place in line.

Yet Abraham at 100+ awakes one morning to the incredible command to sacrifice his only son. The son he and Sarah had been waiting for for so long... waiting obediently and faithfully. The more I thought about this Isaac had to have been about 10 or 12 ( bible scholars please correct me if I am wrong)-- old enough to leave the safety of his mother and camp, old enough to carry the wood up the mountain for the sacrifice. So this means the age where a parent stops seeing the baby in the face of your child and you start seeing the future--- the child's accomplishments, weddings, grandchildren. 

So here is  Abraham seeing the answered promise from all these years of allegiance to God's Will. And yet Abraham answers "Here I am" and  went to give up the most precious thing he had of this world, his most wonderful earthly possession... his son. The Bible doesn't tell us what Abraham thought ( please read the passages for yourself) it simply relates the story of Abraham's slow walk of faith up a mountain, to a known sacrifice. The Bible doesn't tell us if Abraham went willingly or wept as he went. He simply went,  trusting that the God that had provided and protected would do so again.  Hebrews 11:17.

The Faith of the Patriarchs Hebrews 11

¹⁷ By faith Abraham, when he was tested, offered up Isaac, and he who had received the promises offered up his only begotten son, ¹⁸ of whom it was said, “In Isaac your seed shall be called,”^[d] 19 concluding that God was able to raisehim up, even from the dead, from which he also received him in a figurative sense.

This willingness to Trust God created and nurtured the obedience of Abraham's Heart. We are given this story in the bible to understand more of GOD. Not that THE LORD  would cruelly require our children like some pagan god but to show us not until we are willing to give up the things holding us in this world ( Matthew 16:24) will we truly understand what HE is offering us.. all of HIMSELF. 

Abraham and Isaac: Genesis 22

His Voice, like a thunderclap,

commanded the impossible.

At dawn, the servants load the camels.

Sarah looks at me, silent yet full of questions.             

                You are the Lord, the One True God. I will follow.

Isaac, all of twelve, with laughing eyes,

helps me bundle the wood.

He teases the servants about our adventure.

They smile at him and tousle his black woolly hair.

All who see him smile.

Lord, You are Generous. I will follow.

Three days to Mt Moriah.

Three days to fill my heart with the song of Isaac’s laughter.

Three days to fill my eyes with the sight of his face,

the face that echoes my own with eyes so like Sarah’s.

The mountain comes too soon.

Lord, You are Good. I will follow.

We leave the servants.

I am old and gnarled

like the wood

I now place on his shoulders.

Isaac carries it easily,

scrambling up the slope

like a young goat.

Lord, You are Strength. I will follow.

Isaac questions me,

with a joke on his lips.

He thinks I  have forgotten 

what we will need.

He waits for me

with smiling deference.

Lord, You are Steadfast. I will follow.

I climb stiffly.

I am so old now.

If he fights me,

I may not be able to hold him.

I may not want to.

I place each piece of wood slowly

deliberately on the altar.

Can I add minutes to this day?

Can I add seconds to this moment?

Lord, You are Forgiveness. I will follow.

My hands shake.

My breath is old and ragged in my ears.

I dare not see the face of my child

as I wind the rope around his hands.

Yet Isaac’s hands are steady.

His breath as gentle as a lamb.

Calm and willing he is led to the altar.

                Lord, You are Faithful. I will follow

The knife is so heavy as I lift it.

I look down at Isaac.

I am blinded

by his obedience

And love.

The love of a Son for a Father.

The love for me.

My Son,

My Isaac knows his duty.

He has always known.

His faith is great.

His heart so full of love.

The Voice calls me out.

My voice is strong when I answer.

Yet my arms tremble

With what I am about to do.

                Here I am Lord! Here I am.

The sacrifice is pardoned.

A substitute provided.

My hand is staid.

I can breathe again.

I free my Isaac,

then free the life of the Ram

onto the altar.

Lord, You are Provision. I will follow.

I hold my son again.

His heartbeat is the song

of Love

of Promise,

of Covenant Fulfilled.

You are the Lord, the One True God. I will follow.

Part Two- patience of a 12 year old and generosity of a 5 year old

So here is the honest and true reflection I talked about in the previous post. I would really like this post to be a total brag about the generosity of my kids ( which would , of course, reflect on my awesomeness as a parent --right! ). But it is not...although my kids do have a generous spirit given completely by God and not me...and I already "Face-bragged" on facebook earlier with this photo.

So we have been talking about giving a lot in our house. About tithing, about offerings, about giving in general. We have given to organizations like Samaritan's Purse /http://www.samaritanspurse.org/ and World Vision /http://www.worldvision.org/ in the past and usually had a a lot of fun picking out the "goat" or "chickens" etc to give. We have, in the past, told the kids if they want to give some of their own money we would "match" or they could choose which gifts to give. We had talked about this all week and Sunday was going to be the deciding day. Well, the 12 year old and 9 year old excitedly counted out what they could give, figured out the "match" from mom and dad and what we could "get". Very thoughtful and generous. The 5 year old wanted nothing to do with it. This was his money and he wasn't giving anything. Forget it.

This all happened around the magical dinner time hour when I am my most rushed and least gentle in spirit and I ( parent fail coming ) just sent the 5 year old room. I wanted to SPANK him for his lack of spirit... but you can't spank generosity into someone, you can't force a loving heart...you can only nurture it through example and I was failing at that example miserably at that moment.

Jesus would not have spanked my 5 year old ( although I would like to think he would have) . Jesus would do exactly what my 12 year old did. She very calmly and patiently talked with her little brother about giving and needs. She talked about how much WE have and how little so many others have. She talked about how his 4 dollars would be multiplied and blessed to give so much more. How the rabbit he was "giving" was going to help a child eat that might not eat, help a child earn money for school that might not get to go.

This was an image of who we are at our truest selves...the beautiful reflection of God's patience and love mixed with equal parts stubborn selfishness sin. I'm not just talking about the 5 year old. I saw this discussion about giving as just one more task to do and was mad the 5 year old wasn't getting with the program so I could cross off the "to do" list.

I am grateful  my older two reflected the God of infinite patience and love to me and to their brother. I am also grateful for the 5 year old's honesty...and for God showing me my own stubbornness through him.

I pray you will see and feel God's Spirit and Presence this time. That your own nature can be "checked" and that God's nature will shine through

My truest self -- reflected from my 5 year old

This week I feel like God gave me two glimpses into the human condition...OK into my own self. The first one:

Our House--Erik and kids made this one!

Christmas Lights...I love Christmas lights. I love that my husband ( although reluctantly ) puts up our lights and manger display. I love driving around and seeing how creative people are from the store bought commercial giant inflatable kung fu panda Santa to the homemade creche and lights. I love Christmas music singing etc. So a few nights ago instead of driving around I decided to take a walk ( being a frigid 72 I felt we could handle it). The kids thought walking...at night...was crazy---it was dark after all.  So bribery with promised Hot Cocoa got the Monson kids to put on flip flops ( remember 72+ degrees ) , leash the dog, and head out. I tried to engage in the "teachable moment" conversation about symbols of Christmas and favorite Christmas songs. The responses were:

Favorite Christmas decoration ( kids point of view):
1. Giant Inflatables of any kind
2. Animitronic reindeer
3. Multi color lights

Favorite Christmas songs ( kids point of view)
1. "I'm gettin' Nuthin for Christmas" --the five year old
2. " Rudolf the Red nose Reindeer" -- the venison is yummy version--don't ask--its from teh 12 year old
3. anything mom --from the nine year old

Sigh-- So I decided to let go of the teachable moment and just enjoy my time with my kids. And low and behold ... singing. I began humming one of my favorites "Joy to the World" and they sang with me..all three.. while walking down the street. Then "Oh come all ye faithful", then "Silent Night".  With out prompting, with out pushing, with out some made up moment...just singing because God is Good, because He came and will Come Again.

Thank you Jesus. Thank you for giving me a glimpse of your beauty through my kids and Christmas lights.

Sheep's Head Mountain: for my Montana Family

Sheep's Head Mountain 

Sheep's Head Mountain stood like
a suspicious giant behind
Ronan, Montana.
A mere speck of  a city
yet large as a bored child's sigh,
still freshly weird
to a six year old big city girl.
Buried deep within the mountain's shadow
was grandpa's house.
         Grandpa are there really bears here?
         That's right little girl. Seen'em myself.
Flower fields by a crystalline stream
that called to you
on a hot day to play
like a bright mermaid.
Real cows, huge and wonderful
grazing near apple trees.
Jumping into freshly stacked hay,
with Montana cousins,
exotic with Northwest accents
and Montana sun in their hair.
Grandpa held the feline strays
with infinitely patient hands.
Those same hands,
gnarled and sun-stained,
carefully tied the line for fly fishing
or the bright blue ribbon
in his granddaughter's hair.
        Grandpa they're my ponytails, not puppy dog ears.
        OK, little girl. Wanna learn to catch trout?
He was a cheerful inquisitive bird
with his bright eyes and small smiles.
He sent fall leaves from Montana trees.
Precious artifacts from another world.
They were cherished
on a shelf lit by Texas Sun.
Fall leaf rainbows.
Mountain shadow smiles.

Dance Floor

For God in all his fullness was pleased to live in Christ, and through him God reconciled everything to himself. He made peace with everything in heaven and on earth by means of Christ’s blood on the cross. This includes you who were once far away from God. You were his enemies separated from him by your evil thoughts and actions. Yet now he has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body. As a result, he has brought you into his own presence, and you are holy and blameless as you stand before him without a single fault. Col 1:19-22

What came to my mind after reading these verses were certain songs… YMCA, Macarena, Cha-Cha Slide (everybody clap your hands), Thriller. You know the ones. If you’ve been at an elementary or middle school dance, wedding, bar mitzvah, or women’s’ retreat any time recently you’ve heard these songs. And something magical (stay with me here) seems to happen when these songs come on.  People come to the middle to dance. You see friends pulling friends in, kids daring each other to move, wives dragging in husbands, all are invited in.  Some times with great enthusiasm (yours truly), with great athleticism (not yours truly), or with a rather sheepish quiet excitement they come. And they dance. And they laugh. And they smile. And they are together in the middle.  Whether or not they can dance, or they have rhythm, or they even know all the words or can do all the movements they come, because none of those things really matter because its about the music and being together again in the middle.

To me, these verses are an invitation to come back, recognition that things are different now.

You were his enemies, separated from him by your evil thoughts and actions.

At some point, we are all on the outside. We try to dance alone on the outside even as the harsh unnatural rhythms of our sins, of our own nature become misstep after painful misstep. We ignore the True Song written in our hearts that was there before there was sin, before there was an outside, when we were still there in the middle of the Dance of Father Son Holy Spirit.  But we ignore the True Song thinking that we alone are the ones who make the music or that this deep rhythm of our heart, of God’s heart, could never be truly for us.

Yet now he has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body...he has brought you into his presence…

But now we hear this new music bringing us back to the dance floor.  We are called back through Christ and perfected in His Song. There is an open dance card and a space on the floor.

You are holy and blameless as you stand before him with out a single fault.

I am no longer alone. I am no longer on the outside. I am called back by the Spirit into the waiting arms of the Son, to dance before the Father, to dance with my sisters, to dance as One.

Christmas in July or August. Shepherd Song

Images of Jesus birth are often full of angel chorus in the night sky witnessed by some shepherds. A lovely bucolic scene perfect for the flannel graph. My thought reading this passage is always about what kind of men the shepherds were.

Outside at night in the cold and rain. Dirty with the smells of animals and camp fires. Watching for the predators...wolf, lion, fellow man...anyone that could harm their livelihood the rather stupid sheep. These were hard men, not easily shaken.

Yet their first response was not  " Hey, Bud did you see that?" but worship,belief, evangelism. Having witnessed the Angels' Song of Truth , that The LORD, the one true GOD had come down to them, for them, to bring them back like some lost sheep; the shepherds ran to spread the Gospel.

Praying you can witness truth like that. And that you will RUN to spread the song.

The Shepherd’s Song : Luke 2:8-20

The night was cold. No moon, no stars.

Only inky clouds giving nothing

but the promise of rain.

The sheep huddled together –

Their low breathy cries

Hovered above them like a strange mist.

My older brother called the flock,

accounting for each one.

He did the night watch with me, the youngest.

He always went after the lost ones

Bringing them back triumphantly around his shoulders.

The counting done,

I lay down on the hard packed earth,

staring a the black sky

wondering when the rain would come,

if it could wash away the sweat and stink

of sheep that stained my hands.

Dark sky, black night,

suddenly broken

filled with LIGHT.

Light! More than the stars and the moon,

more than the Sun.

Light. More than a thousand suns.

Light.

It pushed into my eyes.

Light.

It pushed me to my knees,

my face in the dirt.

Everywhere, beautiful

Terrible Light.

No sound save my brother’s fearful breathing.

Then a Voice.

A Voice of wind in valleys

And water crashing on rocks.

A Voice that held me

to the ground and pierced my bones.

Do not be afraid!

I bring you GOOD NEWS

Of Great Joy!

The Voice spoke of a child, a Savior.

Then a thousand voices

filled the night.

They sang of

Battle and Victory.

They sang of

Loss and Triumph.

They sang of

Glory and Love.

Glory to God in The Highest!

The quiet returned.

The crickets picked up their night song.

A mother ewe bleated questioningly.

Her lamb quickly answered.

My brother, oldest, strongest, fearless…

was weeping,

His face streaked with mud.

“We were lost and now found.

Our King has found us.

A shepherd’s king.

The Shepherd King.

Let us go and find HIM.

Let us go

And Sing.”

Lilly Monson 11/18/2010

Falling Stars- What summer should be.

With about 5 minutes of trolling on pinterest, facebook, etc you can find literal libraries worth of information on what to do with your kids during summer, how to do things with your kids during summer, why you should organize/teach/inspire/make more of your kids during summer.

 I know the majority of this information is meant to give inspiration and encouragement to parents but most of the time ( at least for me ) it is laced with a fair helping of guilt.  I am not saying we should not seize "teachable moments" ( what a silly term-- your actions are constantly teaching from the food you put in your mouth to the actions you take or don't take ) or that we , as parents shouldn't erect healthy boundaries.

But sometimes its good for them to be bored and outside with friends, sometimes its good for them to work hard at something that has no purpose other than imagination-- they aren't going to show it to you for approval or show it off for comparison.

I wrote this poem a long time ago remembering a friend. I hope you enjoy it.

Falling Stars

Rebecca had long black braids

her momma fixed

every summer morning

before she came over.

She was nine, me seven.

Her quick smile rescued me

from older brothers and TV boredom.

We crashed through driveways,

our bicycles

becoming rocket ships.

The wind whipped our hair

into victory flags

and tore our laughter

into cries of triumph.

Conquistadors,

in bright hand-me-downs

we claimed her backyard swing set

in the name of Spain.

We hunted the Great White Lion,

My slow-footed lazy cat,

Through the jungle of Mom’s tomato garden.

We spent the night outside

In Dad’s old green tent,

Reveling in the sweet musty smell

Of old canvas mixed with the summer night.

We made faces out of the moon,

Then went outside,

Spinning ourselves around holding hands

Until we threw ourselves

On the warm wet grass.

Laughing we looked up

And fell into the stars.